Making Change Happen:

Updated: Mar 26

Depression, anxiety, illness, confusion. What’s going on? Are you like me? I’ve never been more confused about life than I am right now. Does nothing seem to go like you feel it should. Same for me, but I feel some comfort knowing I have a possible solution to my circumstances. I’m ready to make change happen. Are you?

Change Your Boundaries:

Change how you treat yourself and how you allow others to treat you:



Are you feeling depressed, anxious, physically ill, or confused about life right now? I know I am. I think I realize my possible reasons for feeling this way. Read my list and then come up with your own list about what is the true underlying cause of your own situation:


  1. I’m old and my body is falling apart.

  2. Covid-19 is making life difficult for everyone.

  3. I have a major disability. A reality that has hit my self esteem and who I believed I am as a person very hard.

  4. People most definitely avoid me. Why do people avoid me is my constant question. I believe it is because they do not understand me and my disability.

  5. Another reason has a lot to do with myself. I need to change how I take care of myself. If the world is avoiding me, does that mean I’m avoiding my true self also? Am I avoiding my true person and who I am at my core? I have a disability I wasn’t aware of. I lived my life thinking I was a certain person but after learning of my disability that person I thought I was has greatly changed. Learning of my disability has helped me gain understanding as to why I have specific struggles with life. But it also means that I need to change my life to better live life with the disability I have. It’s my disability that has made life so hard and challenging. I’m at least grateful to know the reason why life is such a struggle and understand how I can change my life to have a better experience living life. That is at least a good thing. I’m old and my body is falling apart.

  6. Covid-19 is making life difficult for everyone.

  7. I have a major disability. A reality that has hit my self esteem and who I believed I am as a person very hard.

  8. People most definitely avoid me. Why do people avoid me is my constant question. I believe it is because they do not understand me and my disability.

Another reason has a lot to do with myself. I need to change how I take care of myself. If the world is avoiding me, does that mean I’m avoiding my true self also? Am I avoiding my true person and who I am at my core? I have a disability I wasn’t aware of. I lived my life thinking I was a certain person but after learning of my disability that person I thought I was has greatly changed. Learning of my disability has helped me gain understanding as to why I have specific struggles with life. But it also means that I need to change my life to better live life with the disability I have. It’s my disability that has made life so hard and challenging. I’m at least grateful to know the reason why life is such a struggle and understand how I can change my life to have a better experience living life. That is at least a good thing.


QUESTION for you: What particular issues do you need to change to have a better experience living life? I shared some of my issues. Take time to deeply reflect and analyze your own special and unique situation. No two people are totally alike.


RESOURCE: Establishing Boundaries by Patrick King is an excellent book. I listened to it on Audible while walking on my treadmill. Wow! Great tips and helpful insight. I highly recommend this self help tool.

Change Your Lifestyle to Better Suit Your Needs:


Is life confusing for you? It is confusing me. My career is what is currently causing me stress. Are you the same? Will you allow me to share my struggle? Maybe it will help you with your own decision making. You see, I chose a teaching career over 20 years ago because I have a huge appetite for learning. I thought teaching would fill that need. I also have a huge part of me that can easily self isolate. I chose teaching because I felt it would fill my need to constantly learn and keep me from self isolating or at least make it difficult for me to self isolate. I’m a terrible introvert and actually self isolation is one feature of my disability. Regardless of choosing a career to keep me from self isolation, as I get older, I am becoming more avoidant and still self isolate. I am always learning as a teacher but the things I’m required to learn are not in my interests at all. I often find it is unfulfilling. Seeing students grow, learn, and progress is very satisfying but my need for personal learning is great. I have a drive to learn that just can’t be satisfied. In addition to this, part of my disability includes severe Sensory Sensitivity. I always struggle with it but never knew why or how it affected me. Now that I know, I can balance or realize what is happening better but now I think teaching is just having too much of a trigger to my sensory sensitivity. What about you? What specifically do you need to manage better in your life or change to make life a better experience? It took me a year to come to this understanding so take your time as you plan to make changes in your life. Don’t be drastic but modify in bits and see how it works better for you.


RESOURCE: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy by Seth J. Gillihan is gentle and easy self help. I’m very goal oriented and this book is a great guide in helping you set and achieve goals to help you have a better experience in life.

Change Listening to Others Opinions to Listening to Your Own Self:

Are you guilty of following what everyone else thinks is the right way to be? I do and it totally confuses me and creates huge anxiety in my world. I am certainly grateful for listening to others because it did help me to walk through life choosing a fairly good path. So listening to wise people is important. I’m grateful for that experience. But life is not a one size fits all thing. Now that I’m older, I need to adjust and live a life that brings me greater joy. That means I can’t sit and live life pleasing people. It’s time to do my own thing. Do you ever feel this way too? Maybe you realized this a long time ago. Good for you. Now I have a question for you. If you could be or do anything you wanted and there were no barriers, what would that be? Do you feel you need to switch or adjust your current path? Have you ever considered switching or modifying your career? I am now switching directions towards a writing career. I’ve had a love for writing since I was small. Writing seems to lift, inspire, and bring great joy and fulfillment to me. I can choose to retire from teaching in 2 years. I am choosing my retirement to move into a writing career. I know this is going to fill my needs for learning since there is a great deal of research to writing. I intend to focus on my topics of interest and stick with my personal style of writing. I realize I no longer want to change who I am as a person to fill the needs of another person. I feel like I’m constantly masking my true self. I can no longer do that. I need to be fully me and live my life that is best suited for me. I can no longer live in this world like others. It is not working for me and I don’t fit in anywhere with anyone. I’ve followed what the world has taught me to be, act, and do. It’s been rewarding but also very disheartening. I think money and the issues of money and feeling like I am always having need for money and just the constant chase for money is disheartening for me. I do need to follow a different path now. Do you feel the same? What path are you choosing for yourself? Are you also tired of masking to please others or are you easily accepted by others? What are your reasons for needing change? Next I will share just a bit more about changes I intend to explore more.


RESOURCE: Mental Toughness & Iron Will by Patrick King is a helpful self help resource in being resilient and sticking to your personal values. I highly recommend this book.

Change Complex to Simple:

How desperate are you to make a change in your life? When we hit desperation or close to it, that is when we go into action and begin to make change. I desperately need to make a change. My reasons are many. Have you analyzed your reasons yet? It has taken me over a year to analyze my situation if not longer. You see my disability struggles include social, communication, and sensory disability. It makes it very difficult for me to verbally communicate and understand others. This disability means I’m socially inept. Knowing now my disability and that it is the reason why I struggle so much helps me better understand I need to adjust my environment to help create a quality of life better suited for me. Learning about my disability has been a difficult and heart wrenching thing to discover and realize. But knowing more about my disability also helps me make better decisions about my life. Do you need an official diagnosis of disability to decide you need to make a change. NO, of course not. Analyze yourself as a unique person with your own unique needs. Decide what small changes you can make to make your life better and truly fulfill you. I started with making small changes. I never made drastic changes and I am choosing to stick with my present teaching position. But I am also choosing to leave it at the first opportunity I can. The reality is, I need to. I can’t continue putting my body through all the struggle I go through within that environment at work. I can’t handle it. It’s overwhelming.


Ask yourself how you can make things more simple so you can manage better. Analyze and realize your weaknesses so you can provide support for yourself in those areas. Analyze your strengths. Focus on your strengths and provide support for your areas of weaknesses.


When I sat and analyzed my strengths and weaknesses, I realized anything career oriented for me means I really can’t be around people and loud noises. It is simply too draining for me. I realized I love writing. Writing doesn’t require constantly being around people. It also means I can write about topics of interest to me. Right now those topics of interest cover natural healing methods, environmental issues and change towards living a life more simple. I find satisfaction in being able to take something most people would throw away and create something useful with it. Gardening is a huge topic of interest for me and at the moment I have an extreme interest in herbs and how to use those herbs. For example, I have a keen interest in making my own makeup and self care products from things in the garden and kitchen. Makeup that is very simple, natural, and not something I need to purchase at a store. Some of the areas I’ve been learning about are lotion, blush, foundation, and natural cleaning solutions for the house. I also found I simply love paper. I have a huge supply of used paper meant to be thrown away. But I use that paper to make frames and nice little art projects and activities in my home. I am also interested in cardboard and what I can use it for. I have learned to make a type of cardboard brick. I’m excited about it and believe I can transform this brick into an outdoor brick to outline a garden or path. I am also discovering how the cardboard bricks can be used to make things and even use as insulation. These things are fun and I enjoy them. I am excited about this new direction I’m in. I encourage you to take time to sit down and really analyze what things bring you joy and charge your personal battery. Analyze what things drain you and you find yourself avoiding. Do you have a prayer method? I pray my way through each day as I transition from a school teacher to a writer. I know that path of writing is open for me. I trust in prayer and know it opens doors I never even knew existed. I know we all receive divine direction and guidance as we go through each moment of the day whether we realize it or not. I know we are all unique souls. I know we can all find peace and understand more how we can exist and happily fit better and meaningfully into this world. I know we can love ourselves and who we are and that is all that really matters. That and being a caring soul to ourselves, others, and to the environment.



Blessings on your journey,

Bobbi


You also might be interested in reading a few of my other articles.

  1. Overcome, Adapt, Accept, Make Change

  2. Journaling: My Voice! My Friend!

  3. Fear, Fired, Failure, and New Choices

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