Fear - Fired, Failure, and New Choices

Updated: Mar 26

What I’m doing to work through the struggles


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Many of us experience fear of losing our job, of failure, and having to adapt to new and uncomfortable situations. Many of us are in that battle right now. Here are the tools and how I am working through Fear.

  1. Fear triggers anxiety. Fear of losing a job causes severe anxiety. What can we do to make sure we can maintain or find other employment. Calm the anxiety by using breathing techniques, getting out of the fear mindset by changing our thinking, and being proactive in having behaviors that will help us be a quality and valuable employee.

  2. What if there is a job loss? Research and build a plan of how we are going to find new employment.

  3. Feelings of failure and worthlessness: Analyze why we are feeling this way. Counter it with affirmations and a plan on providing support and balance for our weaknesses and struggles.

  4. Fear of change: Many people do not handle change very well. Prepare yourself for change by mentally walking through potential change and develop a plan of action.

  5. Figure out what will be difficult and provide extra support for ourselves to balance and support ourselves through that struggle.


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The List:

Jodie fears failure, being fired, and not capable of change and success in a new situation. She is constantly overwhelmed by anxiety and feelings of worthlessness. “Is there an alternative to living life?” She wonders. “This world I’m living and trying to survive in isn’t for me!” She sat down and began to creatively brainstorm ideas on alternatives to help solve her current state in life:


  1. Alternative lifestyle - Earthships, off grid living.

  2. Self Employed - writer, energy healer, gardener, housekeeper, stay where I am and do the best I possibly can.

  3. Prayer

  4. Alternative Thinking - put aside my fear and short term needs to focus on what I stand for, value, and represent as a person. Be generous in helping others.

  5. Don’t let fear get in the way of creativity and change.

  6. Give your very best regardless. Just always give your best.


Jodie is ill from all her stress and worry. She takes action and writes several ideas to research. Jodie has hit tough times. She’s still employed and has a couple more years left until retirement. She is struggling with poor health, a disability that makes her job a major struggle to accomplish, and there is a possibility of being fired before she reaches her retirement date.


Jodie looked over her list, taps her chin with the pencil, and doubtfully highlights the choices she feels somewhat good about researching and doing. Jodie doesn’t want to find herself unemployed. She has the hope that this is nothing more than stupid negative self talk she’s dealing with and she will get through her final work years just fine. But she’s always been an extreme worrier. She has worried so much in the past she’s traumatized herself.


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Alternative Thinking:

As she realizes this worry may possibly be nothing at all, she calms a bit. She looks at option D - Alternative Thinking. For her that means being willing to see the world differently. Be willing and able to pick up a new view of the world and how to function happily in it. The lens she would like to look through is living by her values and never stray from them. It’s also striving to see, serve, and listen to people. It means be generous, be giving, and be your best self. She rather step away from fear and give her best. “At least that action will help heal my feelings of worthlessness,” she decides. As she moves forward through the next few days, she feels good within herself. With her focus on being generous, kind, engaging, and bringing her best values driven self to each day; her fears and negative self talk begin to lesson. She’s working on not letting fear be the driver of her life.


Jodie really struggles with social communication and being around people, yet each day that’s what her job requires. It’s taken a huge toll on her health. She battles physical illness and severe anxiety daily. “I get mistreated and misunderstood by others because of my disability,” She says. It damages her self esteem and is the root cause of her feeling of failure. “I prepare myself everyday with a reminder to not absorb the bullying and rude remarks by other employees.” She reminds herself to ride emotional shock waves that shake and resonate through her body when she hears negativity from others. “I have to be self aware and notice the waves, recognize what it is, and why.” She states. “I simply breathe through those feelings until the feelings dissipate,” She explains. Hopefully this is all she needs to do to get through her next couple of years of employment. But Jodie has another problem. She needs a supplemental income when she does retire. So even if she manages to avoid being fired or too disabled to work due to health, she still needs to focus on being self-employed. Her employment will actually never end but her self employment needs to be suited for her specific struggles and disability with poor health, socializing, and communicating with others.


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Self Employed:

Jodie has been self employed several times. She had a little house cleaning business she did while going through college. She actually enjoyed that but she’s too disabled now. She has gone through a great deal of training for alternative healing methods and had a business serving people this way. Jodie is a certified Body Code and Emotion Code practitioner. She is also a Reiki Master. “I love and believe in alternative healing as a supportive measure integrated with conventional medicine,” She says passionately. “I loved it so much I began a 2nd degree in Quantum Physics with a focus on Healing.” She said. Jodie closed her natural healing business down to focus more in obtaining her 2nd degree. That’s when her life began to fully fall apart. She had taken on too much. She ended up with no business and dropping out of her degree program. She also began to realize fully at this time, her disabilities were not going to allow her to work with people in the way she had in the past. Jodie’s speech and communication issues are severe and she has reached a point of using alternative means of communication like writing, texting, and email. She uses Sign Language when she can to communicate with family. Her physical issues are a part of this disability. Old age troubles are affecting her life with intensity. “It’s the alternative healing methods that help me get through each day,” she says. Jodie struggles to find the time to do them with her busy schedule. For herself she tries to do a self Body Code session weekly, a self Reiki session morning and evening, daily exercise, and efforts to eat healthy. Eating healthy is her biggest struggle. Part of her disability is choking. She chokes on everything except an easy to swallow ham sandwich. She’s been eating nothing but ham sandwiches every meal just to avoid the choking. All this struggle she deals with means she is very limited on self employment choices. Her psychologist mentioned Jodie’s special interest should be the area to focus on. Jodie’s special interest is Earthships. Jodie would love to only focus on Earthships but Jodie realizes she’s a researcher and writer. She is keen on writing about her passion. She hopes writing will be something that works for her even though she has so many struggles. She realizes Earthships represent alternatives. Her actual special interest is not just Earthships then but alternative lifestyles. That’s what she can write about. Jodie is excited, but doesn’t know exactly what to start on, where to start, or even how to start.


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Prayer:

That’s where option C - Prayer followed with a lot of research comes in. Her 1st prayer and research project is how. How to start a writing career. She is determined to write and research everyday for the next two years. “I’m a firm believer in the power of prayer, visualizing goals, intention, and manifesting,” She mentions. From all of Jodie’s past prayers and efforts she has successfully brought many of her goals to fruition. Some she regrets praying for. “It’s that saying, be careful what you pray for. You just might get it,” she explains. Some answered prayers she will forever call miracles.


Jodie is in the habit of praying daily for help in achieving goals. “I sit quietly in meditation fully expecting guidance and inspiration,” she says. She knows that each day will have something that will bring awareness of how to achieve the goals she has set. She’s hoping writing is the right path for her. She feels strongly that writing is the right path after all of her recent prayers about it.


Jodie looks over her ideas and plans of how she’s going to get through employment, disability struggles, and retirement with the need of a supplemental income. She feels more confident, centered, and less anxious even though she knows this will not be an easy couple of years. “At least I have a plan,” Jodie states.


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If you are like me and also in need of support here are links that helped me.

  1. Calm Anxiety:

  2. LINKS: Psychologist Barbara Heffernan

  3. mindful psychotherapy with Barbara Heffernan

  4. Employment Ideas I found helpful.

  5. LINKS: Interview with Seth Godin

  6. Seth's Top 100

  7. Battling feelings of failure and worthlessness:

  8. Links: CBT Therapy

  9. Amazon Book: retrain your brain cognitive behavioral therapy in 7 weeks

  10. Fear of Change:

  11. YouTube: How to Deal with Life Changes


Blessings,

Bobbi

bobbisjourney.com



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